Pictures

Our family is really lousy at taking pictures, and once we do have a few- I'm technologically challenged and need Richard's help to put them on the computer for me. You will also note that we are not "posers". Anyhow TA DA- Pictures!!!






Whitney before her 8th grade farewell dance


Whitney before 8th grade graduation. I have some pictures of her with friends that are nice, but was uncomfortable posting other peoples children on my blog without permission.


Jayna at the bike rodeo held at her elementary school.

Jayna on the horse at Viddlers. We just recently made our first trip to Viddlers- an old fashioned 5 and 10 store. You can ride this horse for 10 cents. It was not the standard slow motion ride, but more like a bucking bronco!

Gratitude

It's been a "terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week" Well, not exactly or completely and that's the point of this post. Because truthfully- there have been some terrible, horrible no good, parts to this week- and it's been draining and frustrating. But I'm trying to look for the good in it all and not get too discouraged. So here are some of the good things of the week:

1. Family fun- an afternoon spent bowling with Richard and the kids. Jayna even did one game without bumpers and did quite well.
2. Church friends to chat with for a bit today. I was only there for the first hour, but it was long enough to be with some very sweet people.
3. After being away since Sunday, Richard returned Friday night.
4. Richard was home to make a certain house repair ( part of the terrible, horrible)
5. I finished up what I needed to for one of my jobs- although I felt kind of melancholy about it I'm glad it's done and I can focus on other things that need my attention.
6. Since Richard was home I got some better sleep.
7. Richard seems to be really enjoying his new job.
8. The dog came right back after she escaped out the front door, while I was trying to carry her dog bed out to the car for a showing.
9. Dinner with my kids at Tullys.

So there- some good things of my week- and we'll leave it at that.

And so it goes....

Sue

Adventure?

So we are in the midst of plans to move and I really want it to feel like an ADVENTURE! But sadly I must say that more than anything (especially tonight) it is feeling more like STRESS.

Selling our house- We've had several people come and look, and people that we were told that were interested in it- yet we wait for an offer. It's draining- we have tried to do all that we can do- put in new carpet, got a storage unit for clutter, keeping it clean and ready to show, and more. It gets discouraging to have showings then wait to here something back. We've dropped the price once, hoping that it would encourage some of those that had "shown interest" to make a commitment. Nothing yet. I'm trying to believe that if I've done all I can, God will magnify our effort. And I know we are not in an unusual position- our house has been on the market for just about a month, which is normal. It's just being on a timeline has me stressed out.

Richard leaves on Sunday to start his job. He is subletting a room for awhile. It sounds pretty dumpy, but we needed something pretty fast, and this is rather inexpensive. He'll be sharing a place with a college student. I'm not looking forward to him being gone. There are days I feel my share of "Girl Power", but I'm just not feeling it this time around.

The move- a lot depends on selling our house here. We have considered buying a home as we wait to sell this one- but I'm nervous about multiple payments if this one doesn't sell soon. We have looked for places to rent but haven't had much luck finding a 4 bedroom that will also allow a dog. There is one possibility, but it would be much more expensive than paying a house payment. If we don't find a home soon though- we won't be able to get the kids started at school for the beginning of the year- and as I hard as it is to move them - I think that would make it so much worse.

Like I said - stress, plus Richard and I are busy trying to finish up the end of our jobs here. Sorry this all sounds so down- blech- not what I like, but I was hoping this would be a good way to vent or share or something. Things will all be okay- I just don't know how or when. On another note- more negative things have come up with the company Richard has been working for- just more confirmation that it was good for him to get out when he did.

Just read: "How to Break a Terrorist"- yep you should read it. It opens your mind and gives background on Iraq war, and talks about using "brains" not force to interrogate. It's really good

Reading now: "have a little faith" by Mitch Albom

Ok- and so it goes... ( I know this is all just life and we have to have these times- so here's to ADVENTURING on)

How do you choose a neighborhood?

Well, among all the crazy and busy things that have been going on, the thing that is on my mind is how hard it is to chose a neighborhood without being familiar with the area. We have tried to rank things like: schools, cost, neighborhood characteristics,and distance from Richard's job. It is so hard to rank and then find a neighborhood that matches what we hope for.

Schools- we use the "great schools" website as a starting point which ranks how well schools perform on standardized tests. The ratings go up to 10. However, I know that thats not the only important thing. I want to at least have a 5 or above, and Whitney would really like to have a school that has field hockey- which there aren't that many in the area.

Cost- after moving to where we are now we have thought that we would have done better to choose a less highly rated school and live in a cheaper area so we didn't always feel like we had to penny pinch. Once again the areas with the best rated schools are more expensive to live in ( but also much closer to Richad's job)

Neighborhood Characteristics- This can be tricky- after living in suburbia for years- Richard and I would just like a little more space and privacy- plus many of the areas with more space, are actually less expensive to live in- But we also have 3 kids and the catch is that they would like things close around. Whitney is use to riding her bike all around.

Distance- We are looking at areas very close to Richard's work- but then areas 40 minutes away. We are already preparing for the change of Richard having to work a regular 9-5 job. Right now he often works from home and has a lot of flexibility in scheduling- so he is often home when the kids get home from school or what not. That's going to be a change- and do we want to add another 40 minutes to the day he's gone ( or 80 )- or do we pay more and live in suburbia, with the best schools??

It seems like if we focus on one of the above four topics, the others lose out and I'm having a hard time figuring out what is best. For our whole family. So, how do you choose a neighborhood? ( Much harder with 3 kids!)

And so it goes...

5/22/11

State College- Here we come! After living in Buffalo NY for the past 10 years, it is time for the Ashead's to move on. Richard has been offered a great opportunity working for Penn State Hershey Medical Center. Don't let the word Hershey confuse you, although the main medical center is in Hershey, Richard will be working for the medical centers in State College. His official title is "Lead Support Specialist" I was so excited for him to have this opportunity. He hasn't been happy in his job for awhile here, and has looked elsewhere for a while, but nothing ever came together. This job however seemed to be looking for just what Richard had to offer- and what he would like! Throughout the waiting process- I believe I had my own personal confirmations that this was the right situation for us. (which keeps me sane when I worry about how everything is going to fall into place)
The first day or two I tried to encourage my husband and myself to just be excited and happy and thankful for this opportunity! It is so easy to rush onto all the things we have to worry about and figure out. Anyhow, in the past week or two we have been able to accomplish a lot. Our house is listed to sell and has had a couple of showings; we rented a storage unit to put some of excess stuff in; we did painting and lots and lots of cleaning! Soon we will be going to look at houses in the State College area. Richard is suppose to start work there June 21-I would like the rest of us to be able to join him by mid July or early August.

Lots more to say, but I'm leaving it at this for now.
And so it goes...

Sue

Speculation

Well- for now we are still living in a world of speculation. Are we staying or are we moving? And what's this all about anyhow?

If this was years ago I don't think I would share much info., I would have thought that it would be embarrassing to say we might do something and then not get the job or what not- but here and now- I KNOW MY HUSBAND is AWESOME- and whether he gets this job ( or if we take it or not) does not change the fact that he is AWESOME at all. Anyhow Richard has interviewed for a position working for an out of state university medical center. It seems like it would be a step up from his current job- at least in enjoyment and be a bit more of a challenge for him (which he needs) He has another interview on May 6th- they had told him before that they usually only call one person in for this interview- unless it is very close. So I'm guessing he's top choice- but maybe still has someone he is in contention with. So we still wait. And we don't know what it pays yet- and if we would choose to go if he is offered it.


While we wait- we speculate! Of course! Richard and I have gone to the area and had a quick look at several communities. We had considered taking the kids with us- but decided against it. I didn't want to ruin their perception of the area, by being stuck in a car driving around to areas we may or may not live in. (when we moved to NY- I think I destroyed their appreciation of Niagara Falls by taking them on a freeezy snowy day in Nov. when I needed to get out of the house) Anyhow-at this point I'm not even sure if we hit the area we're most likely to live in, we were able to at least cross a few areas of our list though. So much to consider. Last time we moved, our oldest child would have been starting first grade. This is a whole new ball game with 3 kids aged 9,14, and 16. The area is different too- more rural- I probaly shouldn't have mentioned it to my son that he could join a fly fishing club at school? I have been wanting more space around- but also need a place for everyone to do things.

Well- I still remain so antsy, while I wait- probably another 2 1/2 weeks I'm guessing.

Happy Easter everyone! We were able to do some visiting of family over this weekend and that was good. We continued the egg hunt with the cousins on my side of the family and had one with their little cousins on Richard's side. We had one at my parents on rainy Friday- hiding over 400 eggs for 8 kids aged 8-16! It's kind of fun and funny! When they all go to college we'll probably still have to do this but put gift card prizes in them or something! Although we were visiting family, I did go to church today ( just the first meeting/sacrament) I'm glad I did- I needed it. I love the meaning of Easter.

And so it goes...

Before my head explodes!

I think a lot- sometimes too much, I'm sure. I'm afraid my son has the same tendency- sorry Andrew. I hope through all the negatives my kids get from me- there is something positive too! Anyhow- there is lots on my mind right now- so I'm just going to start writing. Sometimes- poor Richard, I think hears my thoughts over and over as I'm trying to process things. He tends to internalize things,where I like to talk everything out- over and over again. See- like I said lots of thoughts and we haven't even started with the thoughts I was thinking of!

Being in limbo- I don't like it. I'm a planner (sort of.) So right now I find myself in that place of limbo- not knowing exactly what the near future holds. I don't want to give too many details- but here are the basics: my husband interviewed out of state last week. And so now we wait- I'm hoping it's not long- but my understanding is it could be weeks. I've decided that I'm not nervous really- there are good things about staying and good things about moving, but what I am is ANTSY! I've been spending time looking at real estate in our potentially new area, jobs for me in the area, schools...., but I know I could just be wasting time. I want to know and move forward. The good things about staying- not moving 3 kids, including 2 teenagers, things are okay here, and no routine would have to be horribly interrupted. The good things about moving- new opportunity for my husband, benefits that could be really nice to have, and the excitement I get about starting over somewhere new. Oh- and to be honest- it would include a house with at LEAST
1 1/2 baths! This situation with one bathroom in our house is ridiculous! The kids have been told the possibility of moving and they have met it okay for the most part- Whitney has shed a lot of tears. And at this point it is just an idea.

Work- I'm a bit conflicted here- maybe a lot- and as the above paragraph states-maybe I shouldn't even be worrying about it since I might be moving. Since August I've been working two part-time jobs. My intent was to work both of them for a year- or at least until the end of the school year- and then reevaluate. It's been on my mind a lot- and one of my employers said he would like to know my intentions.

Job A- I work as a COTA (certified occupational therapy assistant) in an alternative school. ( the kids here have behavior, or emotional or psychological issues that don't allow them to attend a "regular" school) I work there 3 days a week. I have around 15 kids ranging from kindergarten through high school. I prepare activities for each of these kids to help meet their goals. I see most kids 2 days a week. Their goals range from visual motor/visual perceptual activities, to handwriting and scissor skills, social skills, safety awareness, and self regulation abilities.

Job A's Pros:
1. It can be fulfilling to see one of your kids "get" it or to provide a positive example to some of these kids who don't have many.

2. The pay is decent.

3. I am using the degree I went to school for.

Job A's Cons:
1. It can be overwhelming- the schedule is tight, and there is a lot to do besides just treat the kids- documentation, working with teachers, finding activities and getting supplies. I find I do more on my own time than I would like.

2. I still feel "new" at this job- and sometimes wish I knew so much more! I want my time with these kids to be as productive as possible.

Job B- I work as a Program Assistant at an Adult Day Care Center. Several of the clients here have dementia. We help them with breakfast and lunch, plan activities/games for them. Occassionally help with personal care. I am hired per diem here. I originally was working one day a week, which was good. Then I was asked to cover for someone once and from them on it's been the two days a week. Just recently I asked to go back to one day a week- in the end I said at least give me a day off here and there.

Job B Pros
1. I feel passionate about the service this is providing- we allow caregivers the ability to carry on with their daily needs or gain some respite AND provide positive socialization and activities for their loved ones. I know this is meaningful to me since I have a Dad with alzheimers, but I think I would feel this way anyway.

2. Although I'm just per diem and can't really take advantage of most of the benefits- the company is one of the best to work for in the area ( through Kaleida Health)

3. If I ever wanted to work as a COTA with a different population- this would be a good way to keep my foot in the door.

4. No stress- I show up, do my thing and go home!

Job B. Cons

1. The pay is lousy ( just a little more than 1/2 of what I make at my other job)
2. I'm not using my official degree
3. I work short hours- usually 4 hour shifts and it's fine- but I think if I worked more there would be times I would find it a bit mind-numbing.

So anyhow- that's what I end up with. There are times I would really like to consider just being a program assistant ( or something similar), no stress- show up, go home, do something good, help others. I really feel like all this working and stress on my mind has made me not the Mom and wife I want to be. But I have a hard time justifying working for so much less- if the reason one works is to make $. The other option is maybe there is a job C that I have discovered yet. I don't know- I come up with a plan then change it....

Vitamin D- Oh it was a nice sunny day! Did some yard work, cleaned out the car and am getting ready to go start a fire in our fire pit.

And so it goes...

Reading now : To Kill A Mockingbird . It was choosen for book club- I have a friend that LOVES it, but I have to say I haven't fallen in love with it. It was kind of fun when I opened up our old copy. Inside, around page 20 I found a hall pass from my husband from when he was in high school- truthfully that was probably as far as he ever got with it. (He's not a fan either!)