Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Speculation

Well- for now we are still living in a world of speculation. Are we staying or are we moving? And what's this all about anyhow?

If this was years ago I don't think I would share much info., I would have thought that it would be embarrassing to say we might do something and then not get the job or what not- but here and now- I KNOW MY HUSBAND is AWESOME- and whether he gets this job ( or if we take it or not) does not change the fact that he is AWESOME at all. Anyhow Richard has interviewed for a position working for an out of state university medical center. It seems like it would be a step up from his current job- at least in enjoyment and be a bit more of a challenge for him (which he needs) He has another interview on May 6th- they had told him before that they usually only call one person in for this interview- unless it is very close. So I'm guessing he's top choice- but maybe still has someone he is in contention with. So we still wait. And we don't know what it pays yet- and if we would choose to go if he is offered it.


While we wait- we speculate! Of course! Richard and I have gone to the area and had a quick look at several communities. We had considered taking the kids with us- but decided against it. I didn't want to ruin their perception of the area, by being stuck in a car driving around to areas we may or may not live in. (when we moved to NY- I think I destroyed their appreciation of Niagara Falls by taking them on a freeezy snowy day in Nov. when I needed to get out of the house) Anyhow-at this point I'm not even sure if we hit the area we're most likely to live in, we were able to at least cross a few areas of our list though. So much to consider. Last time we moved, our oldest child would have been starting first grade. This is a whole new ball game with 3 kids aged 9,14, and 16. The area is different too- more rural- I probaly shouldn't have mentioned it to my son that he could join a fly fishing club at school? I have been wanting more space around- but also need a place for everyone to do things.

Well- I still remain so antsy, while I wait- probably another 2 1/2 weeks I'm guessing.

Happy Easter everyone! We were able to do some visiting of family over this weekend and that was good. We continued the egg hunt with the cousins on my side of the family and had one with their little cousins on Richard's side. We had one at my parents on rainy Friday- hiding over 400 eggs for 8 kids aged 8-16! It's kind of fun and funny! When they all go to college we'll probably still have to do this but put gift card prizes in them or something! Although we were visiting family, I did go to church today ( just the first meeting/sacrament) I'm glad I did- I needed it. I love the meaning of Easter.

And so it goes...

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Before my head explodes!

I think a lot- sometimes too much, I'm sure. I'm afraid my son has the same tendency- sorry Andrew. I hope through all the negatives my kids get from me- there is something positive too! Anyhow- there is lots on my mind right now- so I'm just going to start writing. Sometimes- poor Richard, I think hears my thoughts over and over as I'm trying to process things. He tends to internalize things,where I like to talk everything out- over and over again. See- like I said lots of thoughts and we haven't even started with the thoughts I was thinking of!

Being in limbo- I don't like it. I'm a planner (sort of.) So right now I find myself in that place of limbo- not knowing exactly what the near future holds. I don't want to give too many details- but here are the basics: my husband interviewed out of state last week. And so now we wait- I'm hoping it's not long- but my understanding is it could be weeks. I've decided that I'm not nervous really- there are good things about staying and good things about moving, but what I am is ANTSY! I've been spending time looking at real estate in our potentially new area, jobs for me in the area, schools...., but I know I could just be wasting time. I want to know and move forward. The good things about staying- not moving 3 kids, including 2 teenagers, things are okay here, and no routine would have to be horribly interrupted. The good things about moving- new opportunity for my husband, benefits that could be really nice to have, and the excitement I get about starting over somewhere new. Oh- and to be honest- it would include a house with at LEAST
1 1/2 baths! This situation with one bathroom in our house is ridiculous! The kids have been told the possibility of moving and they have met it okay for the most part- Whitney has shed a lot of tears. And at this point it is just an idea.

Work- I'm a bit conflicted here- maybe a lot- and as the above paragraph states-maybe I shouldn't even be worrying about it since I might be moving. Since August I've been working two part-time jobs. My intent was to work both of them for a year- or at least until the end of the school year- and then reevaluate. It's been on my mind a lot- and one of my employers said he would like to know my intentions.

Job A- I work as a COTA (certified occupational therapy assistant) in an alternative school. ( the kids here have behavior, or emotional or psychological issues that don't allow them to attend a "regular" school) I work there 3 days a week. I have around 15 kids ranging from kindergarten through high school. I prepare activities for each of these kids to help meet their goals. I see most kids 2 days a week. Their goals range from visual motor/visual perceptual activities, to handwriting and scissor skills, social skills, safety awareness, and self regulation abilities.

Job A's Pros:
1. It can be fulfilling to see one of your kids "get" it or to provide a positive example to some of these kids who don't have many.

2. The pay is decent.

3. I am using the degree I went to school for.

Job A's Cons:
1. It can be overwhelming- the schedule is tight, and there is a lot to do besides just treat the kids- documentation, working with teachers, finding activities and getting supplies. I find I do more on my own time than I would like.

2. I still feel "new" at this job- and sometimes wish I knew so much more! I want my time with these kids to be as productive as possible.

Job B- I work as a Program Assistant at an Adult Day Care Center. Several of the clients here have dementia. We help them with breakfast and lunch, plan activities/games for them. Occassionally help with personal care. I am hired per diem here. I originally was working one day a week, which was good. Then I was asked to cover for someone once and from them on it's been the two days a week. Just recently I asked to go back to one day a week- in the end I said at least give me a day off here and there.

Job B Pros
1. I feel passionate about the service this is providing- we allow caregivers the ability to carry on with their daily needs or gain some respite AND provide positive socialization and activities for their loved ones. I know this is meaningful to me since I have a Dad with alzheimers, but I think I would feel this way anyway.

2. Although I'm just per diem and can't really take advantage of most of the benefits- the company is one of the best to work for in the area ( through Kaleida Health)

3. If I ever wanted to work as a COTA with a different population- this would be a good way to keep my foot in the door.

4. No stress- I show up, do my thing and go home!

Job B. Cons

1. The pay is lousy ( just a little more than 1/2 of what I make at my other job)
2. I'm not using my official degree
3. I work short hours- usually 4 hour shifts and it's fine- but I think if I worked more there would be times I would find it a bit mind-numbing.

So anyhow- that's what I end up with. There are times I would really like to consider just being a program assistant ( or something similar), no stress- show up, go home, do something good, help others. I really feel like all this working and stress on my mind has made me not the Mom and wife I want to be. But I have a hard time justifying working for so much less- if the reason one works is to make $. The other option is maybe there is a job C that I have discovered yet. I don't know- I come up with a plan then change it....

Vitamin D- Oh it was a nice sunny day! Did some yard work, cleaned out the car and am getting ready to go start a fire in our fire pit.

And so it goes...

Reading now : To Kill A Mockingbird . It was choosen for book club- I have a friend that LOVES it, but I have to say I haven't fallen in love with it. It was kind of fun when I opened up our old copy. Inside, around page 20 I found a hall pass from my husband from when he was in high school- truthfully that was probably as far as he ever got with it. (He's not a fan either!)